WEEK 17 HJ ~ Are you answering your call?

What an amazing week……actually they are all amazing!  I cannot tell you just how much this journey has changed my life.  It’s so funny, we go to see “motivational speakers” in hopes to change our lives, when we already have everything we need inside us!  We were born with it!  Perhaps you just need to find it like I did.

During our session last Sunday, Mark J shared the video below with us about Aimee Mullins.  Take a look……

I decided to research this gal a bit, and she is such a great example of how we are in control of our destiny.

Every bad thing or situation that we come across is not a stumbling stone…..No, indeed it is just another opportunity to answer the call!  As Aimee puts it…..it is her unfair advantage.  How cool is that?

You were born perfect, the perfect YOU!  Can you see that?  You are perfect just the way you you are perfect stoneare!  Everything you need you already have!

Do you remember as a child how you had such an amazing imagination and it didn’t matter what was “supposed” to happen….right?  You had all of these amazing ideas of what and who you wanted to be.  Do you remember what yours were?  By now, I am sure your ideas of what or who you want to be are a bit different, but what you are not doing is imagining….tapping into that inner light of yours!

If Aimee and her story inspires you even just a little bit, go research and watch her journey….it is awesome!

life is a journey little girlThen, embrace your journey of life. Everything happens for a reason. Don’t be afraid.  Sometimes we get discouraged because something doesn’t turn out the way we wanted it to, but that’s just because it wasn’t supposed to happen that way.  Embrace that and just get excited for what is to come!  Sadness and sorrow have no place in your life……love yourself and others. Have only love in your heart, and give to give!  The rest will just fall in to place.

There is no such thing as Chance, Coincidence or Luck ♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA, #CILLASMKMMA, #MKMMA2014, #AIMEEMULLINS, #MASTERKEYSYSTEM

WEEK 17 ~ Permission

Such an interesting week indeed!

In our webinar this week, Mark J asked us if we had given ourselves Permission for Abundance. tree of abundanceAnd actually this could be replaced with anything you desire.  What is so interesting, is that this week I did experience the result of this permission.  I had already given myself permission, even though it was not a concious thought.

I have a story to tell about this, but before I do I really must give you some background first.  Stay with me folks 🙂

You see, I lost my son Cliff to suicide in May of 2005.  I had been in the Mortgage business for many years, and with the  crash in the market, and the loss of my only son, lets just say I was out of commission for several years.

I entered back into the mortgage business in February of 2012, almost 7 years after the loss of my son.  A lot had happened during those 7 years, and we had lost just about everything.  I got tired of all of the loss, and it was time to step up and take back my life, the life I desired.

So, since licensing had changed, I now, at the age of 50 was going to have to get yet another license.  It wasn’t as easy as it had been many years before, but I did it!  And so the path began.  Now one of my challenges was that the vehicle we had was older and had over 150k miles on it.  About a year after getting back into the mortgage business, my boss had a car that she was just a tad upside down on.  She could have very easily sold it and taken the hit, but she did an amazing thing for me, and she allowed me to take over payments.  What a gift that was for me! My credit at this point in my life was non existent.  So, I happily took over payments and finally had a reliable car we could actually travel in.  My original goal was to pay that car off in 12 – 18 months.  Unfortunately that did not happen.  And, it was weighing heavy on me that I had not yet gotten this car in my name and refinanced it.  I had been working hard to re-establish my credit but one thing after the other had kept me from accomplishing this goal.  Well, when I was on vacation a week or so ago, I had just told my friend Kelly that once I paid off my car, I was going to lease a Mercedes.  I knew this was way off into the future, but it was a real burning desire of mine.  So back to last week.  I had determined that by 1-16-2015 I had to get this car situation handled.  I had put everything credit wise into place, and I applied at a local credit union to refinance the car.  I was declined for the loan and was absolutely devastated!  And yet, this goal of mine had to be met.  I went online to our local Carmax and filled out an online inquiry.  A really nice gentleman called me and I told him everything the credit union had told me.  He advised me to take a look at the cars they had online, and once I had picked out  a car to give him a call and he would run it over the phone.  So I did, and guess what…..I found a cillas new carreally nice white Mercedes C300 Sport for $25k and it only had 29k miles on it.  So I called him back and he ran my credit……I was approved for the best financing they offered.  Hmmmm, chance?  I don’t think so….to top it all off, zero down!  I was going to trade in the car I had been making payments on, but my boss decided she would just take it back if that was okay with me. Such an incredible blessing for me indeed. ♥

Funny thing is, I have never in my life ever owned or desired to own a luxury car.  This was a first for me, and I now have it.  Of course now I have to pay for this car, but for once in my life I purchased a car after somebody else took the hit of depreciation!  Yahoo!Permission Granted

So yes, I have given myself permission to have and be whatever I desire in life.  And….I believe I will have it!  Without belief, you simply cannot obtain it.

As this week wraps up I am so very blessed to be on this amazing journey, and if any of you want to experience what I am, just reach out to me….I would love to share this with you anytime!

i am ready to attract abundance

There is no such thing as Chance, Coincidence or Luck ♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA  #CILLASMKMMA  #MKMMA2014  #MASTERKEYSYSTEM

WEEK 16 ~ Kindness ♥

Kindness……the focus of the week in our MKMMA journey this week.

kindness on the beach

You know, life tends to keep us busy worrying about mundane things.  We tend to focus on tasks, rather than on how to manifest our true desires.

Let me explain just a bit…..  If we focus on tasks, that is a reactive state, not one of building.  And, the truth of the matter is, if we are focusing on the right things, the tasks take care of themselves.

Now, I am not saying that I am perfect, nor do I think we should seek perfection.  What I am saying is that we should be very clear of what our hearts desires are….our true unique gift, our shining light within, and FOCUS on that!  Then, the little tasks that are no more than “busy work” simply happen.  We don’t even have to think about them.

Now, in regards to our FOCUS on KINDNESS this week…..can you imagine what might happen if you were to FOCUS on something like KINDNESS all week?  free hugs

Let me share with you an incident that happened to me this week, and how I am sure you will agree it would have gone very differently had I not been focused on KINDNESS!

I was at the gas station, filling up my car, needing to get to my destination of course.  I was at anarco gas machine Arco, and you know they have those machines that take your money and put it on the pump you choose?  Well here I was, putting in my money, and this old lady was standing right next to me, in “my personal space”.  I was annoyed, and turned and looked at her….of course I was annoyed with her for being in “my personal space”.  And then, she said to me “I have never done this before….I don’t know how to work this thing”.  At that very moment I was so ashamed of myself for getting annoyed, and I immediately shifted gears.  As soon as I was done with my transaction, I helped her all the way through the process.  She was so thankful, and I felt absolutely blessed to have had the opportunity to help her. ♥  It was not merely by chance that this happened….no, no no.  It was a blessing to us both.  How awesome is that!

Act of Kindness

So, I ask you……what will you focus on this week?  And how might that change the outcome of this incredible week ahead for you?  Do it!  And, Do it NOW!  🙂

There is no such thing as chance, coincidence or luck♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA  #CILLASMKMMA  #MKMMA2014  #MASTERKEY  #KINDNESS

WEEK 15 ~ What do you focus on?

As the week comes to an end, I have to share an experience I just had last weekend.  I am a New Year’s baby, and one of my most favorite things to do for me,  is go camping in the desert.Cillas and Kelly at Mojave Desert Jan 2015  Since we had to get rid of our old trailer and truck several years ago, the opportunity to do this had not happened in a very long time.  However, we did get up very early on January 1st and head out to the desert!  Such an exciting time indeed.  That is until we had a little mishap.  You see, I have a very sensitive nose…..it is actually a curse.  I have learned over the years to just try and keep it to myself as those who know me best find this rather irritating.  When we first gathered in the motorhome in the afternoon, I smelled exhaust from the generator.  I of course let everyone know, and yet none of them seemed to be disturbed by it so I just wrote it off as my sensitive nose at it again.  We enjoyed our evening and went to bed.  I kept waking up and wishing that the smell would go away…..I remember hiding my head under my sleeping bag so I could breath.  I got up at about midnight or so and had a tummy ache.  My poor hubby had to go and fetch my Pepcid from the car in 19 degree weather.  I took one pill and nothing, then a second and still really no relief so I just went back to bed.  At about 6 am I had to get up and go to the bathroom, and while in the bathroom nearly passed out.  A wave of heat came over me and I barely made it to the front of the motor home.  I told my hubby that I really wasn’t feeling well at all and laid down on the couch.  Laying down seemed to help, but I still didn’t feel well.  The others began to wake and came into the front of the motorhome.  I explained I wasn’t feeling well and thought that perhaps I had developed an intolerance to champagne since that is the only thing I had consumed the evening before that might make me feel this way.  Then, as we were talking my girlfriend who was in the back of the motorhome made a very large couple of “thuds”!  I told her hubby, go see if she is OK!!  Well, she was not, in fact she had passed out and was out cold.  We all had a spike in adrenalin and hurried to get her out of the motorhome and into the fresh air.  It was now very clear to us all that we were experiencing carbon monoxide poisoning.  So, here I was with only my long underwear on, no socks because of the heat wave that had overcome me when I thought I was going to pass out, standing out in the now 21 degree weather.  It was touch and go there for a few minutes as to whether or not we were going to have to call 911.  My girlfriend, we will call her Kelly, finally came too and we were watching her like hawks.  campfire in the desertMy hubby started a fire so we could all stay warm and steered clear of the motorhome.  Of course we were all under the influence of this carbon monoxide, and certainly not on our “A” game, and just sat there, staring at the fire reflecting on what had just happened to us all.  My friend Kelly has a very sensitive system and so we were all very worried about her.  Finally at about 1pm we decided it was time to take a trip to town and buy carbon monoxide detectors and get a bite to eat.  I had started a new eating program on December 26th, but decided this was not the day to worry about a special diet.  I must tell you that was the best pizza I have ever eaten in my life! pizza factory in ridgecrest And, while we could have dwelled on the negative of this situation, I reminded everyone that everything happens for a reason.  While we may not ever know what that reason is, we must embrace the situation, learn from it, and know that this experience will most likely save other lives down the road, or at the very least impact somebodies life tremendously.  Kelly’s husband felt bad because he did have a detector in the motor home, but when in storage he removes the fuse because it drains the battery.  My words to him, “Do not feel bad, you will never forget to put the fuse back in again!”  This alone may be the very reason this happened.  Embrace all things, situations, trials, triumphs in your life with only positive thoughts!  It is a fact that you cannot have a negative thought and a positive thought at the same time.  In addition, what we think about GROWS!  So, choose to think only positive thoughts!  And then enjoy how your life is forever changed!

There is not such thing as chance, coincidence or luck♥.

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA  #CILLASMKMMA  #2014MKMMA

WEEK 14 ~ “Rudy”

Daniel EugeneRudyRuettiger (born August 23, 1948) is a motivational speaker who played college football at the University of Notre Dame. His early life and career at Notre Dame was the inspiration for the 1993 film Rudy.Rudy being carried back to the locker room

We were tasked to watch one of 4 movies this week.  It is so funny, but my husband and I had watched several movies during this holiday and here it is Sunday and now we need to watch another movie.  I know, I am easily amused, but we had watched a few movies already about “Football”, but for some reason I chose to watch the movie “Rudy”.

It is a movie, based on a true story about a young man who always wanted to attend Notre Rudy showing how much smaller his isDame and play on the football team.  Now, many things/obtacles were stacked against him.  For one, he didn’t have the grades to attend Notre Dame.  And, he was not a large guy, quite small actually in physical size.  But what Dan Ruettiger  lacked in physical size, he made up for in his shear will and determination to get his hearts desire.

When in his senior year a bus was there to take seniors to see the Notre Dame campus, Dan Ruettiger stood in line and when he got to the front of the line, the teacher would not let him on.  He was told that he would never have the grades to attend Notre Dame.

So, rather than giving up, he saved up money and took a bus to Indiana.  He had nowhere to stay, but he went right to the campus and spoke with the guard on duty.  The guard sent him to the church to speak with the priest.  The priest ended up telling him that if he went to the local community college and made grades, he would see if he could get him in.

I believe it took him 2 years if I remember correctly, and he got his chance to get in.  This was quite an amazing accomplishment all by itself, but that was not the end.  Dan Ruettiger had to play on the football team.  He walked on and trained and never ever gave up.  What some Rudy with letterman jacketthought of as a fluke, Dan got on the team as a Senior walk-on, but was thought to never have the chance to play.  Still, he never gave up.  He had befriended the grounds keeper and worked for him.  His friend back home had bought him a “Notre Dame” lettermans jacket from a thrift store many years before, and he had worn it long before he ever made it to Notre Dame.  He believed that he would reach his goal.  And even though he had all of the cards stacked against him, he still persisted on.

I really enjoyed watching this coach and how he mentored these young men.   One thing I noticed, was as the players were running out of the locker room, they would all tap on the signs on the wall referring to them as champions, winners!  (Ha, this is rudy and the groundskeeperexactly what one of our assignments are!  Our mind is an amazing tool that we seldom if ever tap into.)   And, the grounds keeper ended up to be his greatest motivator of all!  Dan Ruettiger almost gave up in the end.  Boy, he had surrounded himself with all of the elements that would keep him “in the game” so to speak.  Take a look at this video, where finally he got on the roster, but never ever did he think he would actually play…..it only meant he would stand on the side lines suited up.

Everyone on that team had watched him persist regardless of his size.  Seeing how huge his will and determination was……and in that last few plays of the game, the teammates and then the crowd were all chanting “Rudy, Rudy, Rudy”!  So, he not only got to play, but he actually sacked the quarterback in the last play of the game.

rudy-sean-astin

Here is a video I found that show the “real” Rudy Ruettiger walking you through the movie and I get chills as I watch it remembering the movie…..

This is such an example and inspiration to us all.  Do you have a burning desire?  Have you ever even asked yourself what your internal gifts are?  You are perfect just as you are, and your dreams, your burning desires are yours and yours alone.  Only you are the perfect “you”.  Don’t give up on your gifts, the world is waiting for you!  Dan  Ruettiger had to overcome so much to obtain his goals and now is a motivational speaker; does that surprise you at all?

Share with us!  Dig deep and find your inner light, your God given gifts!

There is no such thing as Chance, Coincidence, or luck! ♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA  #CILLASMKMMA  #MKMMA2014  #‎RudyRuettiger‬

WEEK 13 ~ Life after Loss

After losing my only son to suicide in May of 2005, Christmas and Mother’s Day have become a mom by the fire rememberingthe hardest times of my life.  Every day is tough, but it is near unbearable during these times.

Last year a new tradition was formed with my niece and nephew Janel and Zachary.

We spend the afternoon/evening together….we start with the movies and then go to dinner.  It is so perfect because it is as if we have the town to ourselves!  No crowds, and quality time together.  This year was no exception.  We brought along my mom this year, and had an amazing time!  We always start at xmas eve 2014 at the moviesthe movies, and of course they get to pick the movie.  So far it hasn’t been a movie I would go to myself, but I enjoy just being with them as they enjoy the movie.  Afterwards we headed for pizza.xmas eve 2014  Very yummy and had some great conversation as usual.  We dropped off grammy and headed to go race go carts…..oops!  They were closed; darn it!  But I manage to coax Zach into taking another pic with me…..Janel didn’t want any part of it!

xmas eve 2014 me and zach

Such an amazing day, and I had managed to do so well this year…..then, Christmas Day and Facebook.  Let’s just say that is not a good combination for me.  While I absolutely love seeing all of the festivities, it just makes it too hard on me.  It just reminds me that my son is no longer with me.  So, I went into diversion mode.  Now, some may not think that is a good thing, but I will tell you that I get through these tough days in any manner that I can.

So, my hubby and I watched movies all day.  You would think he might get some that were uplifting, happy, etc.  But no, he managed to get tear jerkers….lol  He knows what I like, and they were awesome movies, but come on with all of the tears already.  I have been a bit paralyzed since Christmas, but I have learned to allow myself this time to re group and seek strength in it.  So today, I am strong!  I am ready to make the changes in my life to get exactly what I want.  Nothing in the way of my success, and reaching all of my goals through my “DMP” (Definite Major Purpose)  It is so awesome to know exactly where I am headed, and therefore know whether or not something I want to do will fulfill this goal.  Makes life so much easier to manage.

Find your DMP and your inner gifts!  Share them with the world….they are waiting for you!  And, remember to have only LOVE in your heart ♥

There is no such thing as Chance, Coincidence or Luck ♥

Priscilla L Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

#MKMMA  #CILLASMKMMA  #MKMMA2014

WEEK 12 ~ Blessings

I begin my Week 12 with 2 of my favorite people, my niece and nephew Janel and Zachary.  Janel is in the Choir and had her Christmas Program.  What a delight to see her perform.  She is such a beautiful young lady.Janels xmas choir performance

The Christmas Choir program fell on December 15th, and my nephew Zachary’s birthday was the very next day so we went to Red Robin to celebrate his birthday a little early.  He doesn’t really like his picture to be taken, unless of course he is on his dirt bike in full gear, airborne!  But he took his very first selfie with his “Aunt C” ♥  That’s what they call me 🙂

selfie with zachary at his bday dinner

I spent the first 3 months of each of their lives with me at my mortgage offices.  We bonded deeply, and they will always have a huge part of my heart!

Such a blessing it was to me to spend this quality time with them.

 

 

 

Fresno SOS logo

On Tuesday, December 16th,  I was with fellow survivors of suicide loss.  I lit a candle for my son Cliff, and hearing all of these amazingly beautiful people speak about how they didn’t know how they would have survived their loss without Fresno SOS, just fueled my motivation to continue to support this organization.Cliff and his cowboy hat cropped

Christmas is a very tough time of the year for anyone who has lost a loved one. ♥  I am so grateful to be able to help others, which in turn helps me as well.  I wouldn’t wish this pain on even my enemy, but I am so thankful that I can help in some manner.

Be kind to your loved ones, hug them often, and make sure they know just how much you love them! ♥

Now, bring only LOVE to all of your holiday gatherings…..leave all of the hurt, the anger, and anything else that might get in the way of spending quality time with your family and friends.

I know first-hand that none of us are promised tomorrow, so make the best of your today’s!

There is no such thing as chance, luck or coincidence! ♥

Priscilla L Brooks, Entrepreneur at heart♥

#MKMMA  #MKMMA2014  #CILLASMKMMA

Week 11 ~ Marriage and Remembering

Week 11 of my Master Key Journey has been yet another interesting one.  More growth and the huge payoff!

I cannot tell you how blessed I am to be on this journey.

This week, I was pushed again….more than I would have been able to endure in my most recent past.  And yet, I made it through the week and made some amazing new memories.

me and MelissaI had the honor of marrying my daughter Melissa; her mom Sara Rogers, my dear friend to whom we lost to cancer in January of 2011 to colon cancer.

 

 

 

This photo of Sara was from the day she asked me to take care of her daughter Melissa……and she would take care of my son in heaven♥

My sweet sara

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 13th 2014; It was such a beautiful day.  Just the day before we had crazy rain here in the Central Valley of CA, but on this day, the sun came out, the rain stopped so we were all able to park and not sink in the mud.

Sara poking through the cloudsOn my way to Melissa’s house, I captured this picture…..do you see the ray of sunshine poking through the clouds?  That was my sweet Sara letting me know she was with us♥

 

Nick and Melissa were so happy and did an amazing job!  Aren’t they beautiful?Nick and Melissa saying their vows

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Melissa, Sandy, Katie and I got together to shop for her wedding dress, Melissa was going down the list of what was done and what still needed to be done.

katie melissa me and sandy

 

 

 

One of the items was they needed someone to marry them.  It was at that moment I knew that it would be me!  So, I got ordained, and was blessed to be the one officiating for them on 12-13-14 at 15:16pm 🙂

I got through the ceremony, shared some special words with them both and not a tear from me was shed.  I did that before I arrived ♥

nick and melissaThey are on their honeymoon now, and beginning there life together as husband and wife.  I couldn’t be happier for any other two beautiful people on this earth than I am for them.  And I love them both deep within my heart ♥

On Sunday, it was time to prepare for my 4th Annual Candle Lighting Ceremony, remembering our children who were lost too soon.

2014 candle lighting ceremony logo

I began the morning putting together the video that would be played that evening.  I had so much on my plate this year that I was not able to begin this video until the day of.  In years past, this would not have been possible.  However, over the years I have learned a little here and there, and so I began this project.  I began at about 7:30 am, and at 2:30 pm it was producing……ahhh I thought.  Just in the nick of time so I can get to the location and start setting up.  But no, it took over an hour to produce.  Then, once it was produced I had to upload it to YouTube so I could put it on my sons blog at CliffsStory.com  You see, there are many moms, dads, sisters, brothers, grandmas and grandpas who just aren’t ready to grieve in public.  So for them, I post the ceremony on my sons blog so they can join us in the Worldwide Candle Lighting Ceremony from their own homes.  Well, the video was just about done and then….ERROR; your video is too long.  Yikes!  I had posted it to my sons YouTube channel and didn’t have the unlimited time ability yet.  So, had to upload it again on my own YouTube channel.  This was very stressful, as I should have already been on location setting up for the live ceremony.  But, I wasn’t going to leave my most vulnerable moms, etc. without an online ceremony for them to view.

Now, after the previous 2-3 weeks prior to this, and the pain of the holidays in general, I would have broken down in tears…..but not this year!  I just knew that it was all going to be okay, it was going to be what GOD intended it to be, and I just kept on until finally, SUCCESS!!!! ♥♥♥

The ceremony was beautiful, and I got to connect with some new moms.  You see, I lost my son in May of 2005 to suicide, and reaching out to other moms is something that is near and dear to my heart.  I know how moms feel about losing their children.  They just don’t want their children to be forgotten.  So, I will continue to produce these videos annually and collect photos of our children gone too soon!  They will never be forgotten.

I continue to be overwhelmed by the blessing this journey has provided to me.  It hasn’t been very long ago that I would not have been capable of enduring what I have these past 3 weeks.

Such a blessing indeed! ♥

My friends, you have gifts, gifts that the world need to be blessed with.  Never settle for anything less than your deepest passions!  Within those passions are mighty strength.  No matter what your past has thrown at you, you are still perfect and the world is waiting on your gifts!  Share them and fulfill your need for sharing your unique gifts….we all need them♥

There is no such thing as Luck, Chance or Coincidence♥

Priscilla L Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

Week 10 ~ My Mastermind Alliance

As I end out my Week 10, I have found my new mastermind alliance partner, my husband♥  Me and my hubby

We buried his mom a few days ago, and had a major break through as well.  My husband Tony and I have been married for 21 years.  And yet we still are growing together.  Not apart, but growing even stronger together.

After the funeral and reception, I came back to be with my husband.  We visited with family where we were staying for the evening and then ended up with some time alone.  It was an amazing tender moment for us both.  I shared with him what I had to do in order to wake up with excitement every day, and how without it I could not Cliffords Housebear to live.  Not that I am broken, but that this was my purpose.  Tony knew of my passion in this 6 month course I was taking, but I hadn’t shared any particulars with him.  He of course knows all about “Clifford’s House“, and what that means to me.  And yet, I had never really broke down in tears while telling him just how much it means to me.  There is something very powerful in that moment.  And the most beautiful part of all, is that we both agree on how to keep this legacy alive and thriving long past our lifetime.  What a gift it is to have a partner in life who is in harmony with you.

Today I am preparing for our 4th Annual Candle Lighting Ceremony, in memory of our children to whom have died.  Tony is always right there by my side helping me to make an impact on a family.  We have never had a ton of people show up, but there is always a family that

we are able to help through the holidays.  In addition, I post the actual ceremony on my son’s blog “Cliff’s Story” so that any moms, dads, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles and so on, are able to light a candle at home and share in the ceremony from the privacy of their homes, so we may actually touch many more lives.  However, even if we only help one family get through the holidays, that is what and where God has placed us and we are so very honored to do so. ♥

So, while I did get behind just a bit, my life, and how I live it now is the product of what I am learning and applying from this journey.  So I am strong, whole, perfect, loving, harmonious and happy 🙂  I persist until I succeed!  Nothing ever gets in the way of accomplishing my goals! ♥

And so the journey continues on, and I am ready for it.  I have given Grandma Peteymy respects and buried my mother-in-law, and now it is time to continue on…..fulfilling my definite major purpose in life just as she did♥

There is no such thing as Chance, Coincidence or Luck♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥

Week 9 ~ Holidays without Family

Week 9, Thanksgiving week was a tough one.  Holidays without Family, loved ones who have left the earth too soon, and now a loved one who was with us for many years, but is now gone…..how do we get through Holidays without Family?

I have learned this lesson for almost 10 years now.  I lost my son Cliff and his cowboy hat croppedClifford Edwin Widmer, III to suicide in May of 2005.  It took me many years to get back to the different version of myself now.  I had to learn to be this new person I had become….a mom whose son was no longer here on this earth with me.  A mom who would never be a Grandma, never have grandchildren, and whose heart would ache during the Holidays without him.

On November 26th at 9:15pm my beautiful Mother-in-Law left us…..while it was way past time for her to pass on, it still brought out Grandma Peteythe raw pain of loss……loss during the Holidays is felt ten fold for sure.  It made me so incredibly sad, and grateful all at the same time.  This is a very tough combination of feelings to deal with all at once.  You see, Petey, as we called her, had suffered Alzheimer’s for many years.  We have been sad for many years, but until death, really could not start the mourning process.  So, while it was incredibly sad, it was answer to prayer at the same time.  Finally she is at peace, not trapped in a body where she didn’t even know her family.  While we prepare to leave to travel to her Funeral tomorrow, I had to take the time to get this post down on paper and prepare for the celebration of her finally being at peace.   She is now whole again, no more sickness, beautiful beyond measure, and we will see her again sometime soon ♥

This happening this particular week, and all that I am involved with to fulfill my time here on earth, was almost too much to bear.  However, I am strong, I have purpose, and I wake every day with excitement to share the God given gifts, my Definite Purpose in Life!  With this now being who I am, I somehow get through all of the emotions of the Holidays without Family and am able to pick myself up and continue on this beautiful Journey.

So, we will be traveling early tomorrow morning to show the respect and love for Petey, and life on earth will go on.  We must continue on even though it isn’t always easy to do.  I am so grateful I am able to continue on this journey.  Embracing the sadness, allowing myself to “feel it”, and then continuing on.

As we move from one Holiday on to the next, one of the hardestchristmas Holidays for me, other than “Mother’s Day”, I know that I will be okay.  I am in control, I am pursuing my Definite Major Purpose in life which keeps my sons memory alive!  His Cliffords HouseLegacy will live on way past my time here on earth, so I keep on my journey…..thankful that his death will have a purpose, a meaning, and live on Forever!

Peace be the Journey my friends♥

There is no such thing as Luck, Chance, or Coincidence♥

Priscilla L. Brooks, Entrepreneur at Heart♥